How Clowns Get Blocked on Ashley Madison

Photo by Quino Al on Unsplash

Clowns abound on Ashley Madison, and this is the story of one such clown. I read an article recently that said every woman online has a man talking to themselves in her inbox. I couldn’t help but smile because it’s so true.

I can confirm!

Recently, Syd popped into my inbox and had such a discussion.

Like most women, I don’t answer all of my messages, but I usually read them all, looking for interesting ones or giving out some gratis pro tips for those struggling.

The problem is, sometimes the deserving men act like clowns, and acting like a clown is the surest way to get your clown car to Blocksville.

This is What Acting Like a Clown Looks Like

In the discussion below, unless otherwise noted, all the messages are from Syd.

Dec 29

Please check out my profile to see if you might be interested in connecting with me. If you are interested, ‘wink’ me back, and I will initiate contact!

Editorial Note — This is an autogenerated message sent to the lady’s inbox when a man ‘winks’ at them. The idea, I suppose, is to ‘wink’ back, the AM equivalent of a ‘like,’ which lets the man know to send a message. On AM, ‘winks’ are free, but the initial message can cost between 9 and 14 credits — each credit ranging in price from $0.29 to $0.42, depending on how many you buy. Every subsequent message is free.

Dec 30

Please check out my profile to see if you might be interested in connecting with me. If you are interested, ‘wink’ me back, and I will initiate contact!

Dec 31

Please check out my profile to see if you might be interested in connecting with me. If you are interested, ‘wink’ me back, and I will initiate contact!

Jan 08

Please check out my profile to see if you might be interested in connecting with me. If you are interested, ‘wink’ me back, and I will initiate contact!

Jan 09

Please send me a key to access your private photos.

Jan 12

Your Faery Godmother of Adultery (YFGM) — Thanks for your interest, but if I don’t message, it’s you, not me 😉

Editorial Note — This is an autogenerated message that is sent in response to certain requests on AM. Users can personalize it, and this is what I did for mine.

Jan 14

Please check out my profile to see if you might be interested in connecting with me. If you are interested, ‘wink’ me back, and I will initiate contact!

Editorial Note — If you haven’t been counting, this is the fifth time I’ve received this message because he keeps winking at me.

Jan 16

Good evening [YFGM].. Thank you atleast replied. i am a professional, well educated and looking for a close discreet friendship with benefits. i am a perfect fit as per your profile set. dont want to change my situation but love and passion is missing and looking for a Lover who don’t blow me.. lol

missing the long kisses.. hugss… can we ?

YFGM — Hey sweetie, that was an automatic message from when you [asked for my] pictures. I’m allowed to personalize it, but that’s all it was. I think AM does that to make men use their credits.

Hello [YFGM], yeah might be AM did but after reading your profile again, it is worth to spent the credits :). can we try ? i am a perfect fit as per your profile set.

Editorial Note — My profile says, “Don’t waste your credits on me.” I guess he missed that part in all caps, at the top of my About Me section.

i am just looking for a one good discreet close friendship…

Jan 17

YFGM — Sorry, but I have one of those and am not looking for another at the moment. I sometimes use this account to find someone to join us, though, when I need some extra love lol

lol ok.. Not looking for threesome..

Editorial Note — Oh well, and here I thought a shared pussy would be better than none. And for the record, a shared pussy, when it’s mine, really likes having an extra cock around sometimes.

one quality close friendship:)

one quality close friendship:)

you there ??

Editorial Note — When you ask a question like this, you really should be asking yourself why you need to ask. I suppose there’s a chance she could be fingering herself wildly and be too busy to answer as the Os roll over her, but it might also mean that she’s not that into you.

YFGM — I am, but I’m not looking for one quality close friendship — I already have one, as I said lol

Good to have the Gems.. lol

hard to find

YFGM — They are

i am one of the Gem

and i think you too

good to connect lol

best spark

??

Editorial Note — I guess at this point, he was again wondering where I’d gone.

YFGM — Good night 🙂

why so early

Editorial Note — The correct response to this is ‘good night’ not ‘why so early.’  Like seriously, dude, I don’t report to you.

may i ask.. where you work

Editorial Note — WTF? Sure, want my home address too? How about hubby’s number?

or profession

Editorial Note — Ibid.

Jan 18

Good evening

Jan 19

r u getting messages ??

if not plz whatsapp me 2125551234…

YFGM — Sweetie, I hope you don’t bug all the girls like this because it will probably just get you blocked.

Lessons Learned From a Clown

I didn’t block him, and he finally got the point after the last message above. I asked him if he was having any luck on AM, and he said he’d gotten two responses out of four ladies he contacted. I can only assume he considers me one of those two.

Syd sent me 29 messages over three weeks, to my seven, including the autogenerated one. Nine of those were before I sent him a personal response.

All of his messages appeared in our ‘chat,’ so it’s not like he didn’t know he winked at me five times. I normally tell men that twice with no response is when you stop.

Takeaway

The bottom line is this — if you are winking, messaging, and asking for pics, but she hasn’t responded — STOP!

Not everyone is your YFGM, so they won’t stick around to watch the fun before trying to help you. Most will just block you and move on. And why would she do that?

She’s got an annoying and pathetic man-clown in her life already and isn’t on AM looking for another one.


© Teresa J. Conway, 2022

Author of How to Cheat: Field Notes from an Adulteress, several short stories, I'm active on Medium @teresajconway where I sometimes share my blog posts.

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