Cheating Tips and Tricks – Stop Smiling at Your Phone You Filthy Cheater!

Words to live by from your Faery Godmother of Adultery

There is nothing I love more than getting a nude from my lover — post-shower, a towel draped over his shoulder, cock semi-erect, with, thinking of you written under it. I can’t help smiling when I see him, but that only invites questions. Here are more cheating tips and tricks to avoid that.

I love that cock.

I love it everywhere, but mostly in my body. Anywhere in my body. When I see his cock, I smile thinking of all the places it’s been and all the places it will go.

I smile.

I smile at my phone.

Sitting down in your chair after supper is a great time to catch up on your socials after a long day. Everyone does it, and it can be a lot of fun, but sure as shit, I’ll be looking at a dribble of pre-cum escaping my lover’s urethra, and I’ll hear my hub ask —

What are you smiling at?

And I’ll respond —

My lover’s gorgeous cock of course, do you want to see?

And then I Google divorce lawyer.

Nah. Of course, I don’t do that, because I don’t smile at my phone when I get a sext, a video of him orgasming, or some other fun message from my lover. Because of what always comes next —

What are you smiling at?

Times you smile at your phone

I was reminded of this lesson a few weeks ago, not by hubby, but by one of the many cheaters I touch base with. She was a baby cheater when she first reached out, but has since found a steady lover and is well on her way to a life of happy depravity.

I sent her a copy of my book, How to Cheat: Field Notes from an Adulteress, as I often do, and she was thanking me for it, writing —

“I never imagined I could be happy like this again. Of course, always being careful not to smile at my phone (best advice ever BTW). I definitely keep in mind the cheating tips and tricks in your book.” — Melicious

Like Melicious, I’m not smiling at my phone because I’m seeing a cock, I’m smiling because I’m happy! Happy like she is.

I don’t smile when rando cocks pop up in my DMs, and I warn clients not to send me nudes. I’m not interested in seeing any old cock. I’m interested in seeing the cock that makes me happy.

And when I’m happy, I smile.

Here are the cheating tips and tricks to avoid the above

If you’re not often happy, and all of a sudden you’re smiling into your phone, people will notice. My advice is to join some goofy meme or joke group on the FaceSpaces and be ready to show him (or her) a meme from there if they ask.

Or better yet, don’t smile so they won’t be tempted to get in on the action. Having a side piece can be wonderful in a way you may not have felt in years and it does weird things to your brain and your privates.

It also does weird things to your face like forcing you to start using those muscles again as your sweaty FWB turns your frown upside down. But don’t blow everything by smiling like a fool into your phone because there’s someone in there who really wants to fuck you.