Who’s a dirty Billy now?
Teresa J Conway May 18 · 4 min read
Well, that was unexpected. Choir boy Bill Gates wasn’t just stepping out to save the world, I guess, but what a perfect cover story –
Bill — heading over to Africa with Jeff Epstein to fight malaria, don’t wait up, k?
Melinda — kk have fun
Jeffery Epstein & Billbert
On the subject of saving the world, our man Bill met with convicted pedophile Jeffery Epstein on many occasions, from 2011 onward but who’s to know what they were up to? I mean, Gates wasn’t a Prince Andrew or Bill Clinton was he? Or was he?
“Bill only met with Epstein to discuss philanthropy,” Bill’s spokeswoman, said.
Listen, I’m not going to hack on a cheater for cheating, but hanging with a pedo isn’t what I’d call doing things on the down-low.
I get it. Who do billionaires hang with? But really, Bill? Jeffery Epstein? Come on.
Bad Boss Bill
There have also been rumors going back decades alleging Bill often asked the ladies from work out for dinner. I guess his approach was like old “Uncle” Bill’s when he asked you to sit on his lap at the company picnic after he’d had a couple beer.
Listen, I will give this advice to anyone who will listen — do not pursue affair partners inside your social circles and networks! Just don’t.
Why, you ask? Well, when you run a billion dollar plus company, there’s a pretty good chance she’s going to try and turn your idiotic dinner date invite into her retirement fund.
The old “I’m the boss” trick worked with Melinda
I guess Bill probably thought it would work considering he met his wife, Melinda, a Microsoft employee, in 1987. And when I say Microsoft employee, I mean — his Microsoft employee. The cute couple used to flirt in meetings until Wild Bill finally asked her out after a few months. I guess he came across her in the parking lot after work one night and finally asked.
I wonder, in looking back at the start of their relationship, does Melinda recall seeing many security cameras or tall bushes around where she parked? When Billy Bob finally got his nut up to ask her out did he have help? I mean, Bill’s pretty ham-handed, so I wouldn’t put it past him to have her car and movements tracked so he could wait in a bush to bump into her.
I guess many women can be sort of naïve because who wouldn’t think, gee, the owner of this already huge and successful company asked me out, isn’t that sweet?
What they probably wouldn’t think is, gee, I wonder who else at work Dirty Billy’s asked out?
For Melinda, it was a love story, and god bless her no pre-nup heart! What a love story it was. For Bill, maybe it was something more. Perhaps it was the home run he needed to encourage him to keep swinging at balls?
Did Miss Piggy make bacon with Kermit?
I’m going out on a limb here, but I doubt Bill, with his Kermit the Frog voice, had much luck getting pussy, even with a billion in his back pocket.
I imagine Epstein had his work cut out for him trying to get Bill laid.
Bill liked NDAs as much as Harvey Weinstein did
What we’re also finding out about Bill is that his money manager harassed a bike shop the Gates empire owned, which resulted in a settlement and non-disclosure agreement. Bill arranged the settlement. Melinda apparently didn’t like that, so she asked for an independent investigation. However, no one knows what came of it.
What we do know is Billbo gave Mr. Happy Hands his job back. Of course, he did. Men know best, don’t they?
So what are we to make of all this?
Buffalo Bill was both a shitty and stupid cheater.
Either he was too stupid to figure it out or just didn’t care, but the reality is, going around asking women at work for dates when you are the well-known billionaire married boss is idiotic.
My advice to any cheater is your affair partner must to have something to lose.
Now you’re not going to find too many billionaire chicks out there, but what you will find are a shit-ton of horny married ladies who aren’t looking to be Mrs. Bill Gates the Second, but who would still get a kick out of schtupping a Muppet-voiced billionaire.
So, I’m not going to get all teary-eyed for Melinda or hate on Bill for cheating. All I’m going to say is –
If you don’t know what you are doing, you’re going to fuck up. And just like Jeff Bezos, Bill is another billionaire bro who could have used my book — How to Cheat: Field Notes from an Adulteress.
Don’t be a Silly Billy, buy my book!
Here’s how Jeff Bozo got caught riding the strange bus to tuna town —How Helicopters Gave Jeff Bezos’ Affair AwayA cautionary tale for cheatersmedium.com
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© Teresa J. Conway, 2021The Scarlett Letter