The Perils of Married Dating–Pregnancy

A cautionary tale of stepping out

Photo by Cleyton Ewerton on Unsplash

First and for most, no matter where a child comes from, I think we can all agree that how they were conceived is not their fault. In this story reported in the New Zealand Herald, a proud dad has his dreams of fathering a son dashed when the baby turns out to have different racialize features than both mom and dad.

Hiding cheating at the best of times is a hard task for the experienced cheater, and while an unexpected pregnancy might not give you away, there are a couple of things you cannot hide. Parents with blue eyes cannot give birth to a brown-eyed child because blue is a recessive genetic trait, meaning the parents can only pass on the gene for blue eyes.

Brown-eyed parents can give birth to a blue-eyed child because the brown gene is dominant. If you inherit a brown from dad and a blue from mom, the brown will express itself. If both mom and dad have a blue and a brown, there’s a 25% chance baby can have blue eyes.

The second thing you cannot hide is the racialized traits inherited from mom or dad. Of course, it’s always fairly obvious who the mother is. What is less apparent is who the dad is. What makes us successful as a species is the robustness of how our genes work. Otherwise, we’d never have survived so many thousands of generations of cousin marriage.

Unlike eye color, many traits aren’t so easily explained because of the variety of factors going into making them. Genes influencing skin and hair color exist in many locations along our DNA, so no one factor acts like a flipped switch. It’s more like a series of twenty or thirty switches turning on and off that together determine skin tone and hair color.

How’s all this important? Well, when you read the link to the story below, you’ll read of a dad who not only discovered his son wasn’t his but also found his wife was a cheater — in the birthing room. I imagine that was a bit of a letdown.

None of this was the baby’s fault, but I’ll ask — is that the time you want your husband to discover you’re a cheating whore?

It isn’t. After labor and nine months of pregnancy, you’ll be pretty tired, so that’s the last discussion you’ll want.

I will not tell you to date inside your ethnic community because that’s just plain racist and stupid. But, if you’re going bareback, it might save you some trouble down the road because babe will more or less look like dad. And really, who cares? They’ll look like you, and that’s good enough for me.

If you do, step out of your ethnic lines, and by all means, play the field! Enjoy the buffet! But whatever you do, I recommend thinking about the pill or condoms.

Spare yourself the headache the whining will bring because you know you’ll never hear the end of it, and then you’ll have two babies on your hands. And that’s the last thing you need.Husband’s shock as baby’s birth reveals wife’s infidelity – NZ Herald
Lifestyle As *Mark clutched his wife’s hand and encouraged her to keep breathing, he felt like he was living his best…www.nzherald.co.nz


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© Teresa J. Conway, 2020

By Teresa J Conway on .

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Exported from Medium on April 8, 2021.

Author of How to Cheat: Field Notes from an Adulteress, several short stories, I'm active on Medium @teresajconway where I sometimes share my blog posts.

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