A Letter From a Fan

This was very sweet

Photo by sue hughes on Unsplash

As you would expected we get both positive and negative comments from readers. This one was quite nice, and reminds us of the reason we began writing about adultery. 

Hi, I wanted to drop a few lines after reading your last few articles on Medium. Please forgive me for writing a generic response instead of a more personalized one, but as you are “partners in crime”, i thought one email would suffice. I find your writing insightful, sometimes raw, and thought provoking. I wished you had written your series on adultery when i first joined AM, as it would have explained many things. I am still sitting on the sidelines so any thoughts I have should be viewed as those from an armchair quarterback and probably have little relevance, but here they are anyways.

You have caused me to re-evaluate my ideas and learn, which is great. I have always wanted insights into the female perspective at our age (I’m 53), and you have provided a lot of good information.

I think both of you are amazing, smart, brave women who have laid it on the line to the benefit? (or personal catharsis?) for the rest of us. I find it interesting that we have benefited from the lows in your lives (but I guess we also benefit from the highs that you have with your lovers). I would have never wished anything as the lows you may face in your lives, but I am deeply appreciative of you both communicating your insights. And, it’s some consolation that you have found men who appreciate you for who you are and see the beauty that you embody.

Specifically, I cringed when I read of your weight losses and gains during the pandemic and how anyone could refer to you as “pig” even in jest, or be critical of your weight when both of you are so sensual and convey such depth with your touch. I see elements of such a fuckhead in myself so learning how flippant comments can cut so deeply has helped me watch my tongue a bit more and adjust my attitudes.

I have also learned even more profoundly how the negative imagery women many have starts early, and as I have a teenage daughter, i need to be even more vigilant about my comments and behaviors.

In addition, your recent lying, liars, and cheaters articles also struck a nerve as even though you have to lie, i never saw you as either the model woman or the low cheater (nor a traitor) you wrote of… i think of you both as human. You were brutally honest about your situation and what you needed to survive it. That honesty, to me, supplants any lies you have to tell to survive. We all tell ourselves lies to get by in our days… my job is good, my marriage is good, I will be okay in retirement, my kids are okay, we’ll survive the climate crisis, etc… you live in extraordinary circumstances and those circumstances require extraordinary measures. I just hope when you feel the self doubt creeping in, you will remember you are doing the best with the cards you are dealt. And, if it ever goes bust, there are some who would still think you are great for your depth and honesty to your readers.

As I have said earlier, i do think both of you are amazing, and I wish you both good health and safe seas on the journey you’re on. I look forward to reading more of your adventures.

Thanks for the insights!

Best, ty 

Do you have a comment? Let us know at monalisalady0@gmail.com & tjconwayauthor@gmail.com.

© MonalisaSmiled & Teresa J. Conway, 2020

By Teresa J Conway on .

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Exported from Medium on April 8, 2021.

Author of How to Cheat: Field Notes from an Adulteress, several short stories, I'm active on Medium @teresajconway where I sometimes share my blog posts.

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