I’m an Unethical Monoamorous Polysexual

Because everyone needs a label

Photo by Molly Mears on Unsplash

That’s right, I’m married, love a man I’m not married to, want more than one cock, and tried a woman.

In this label driven world, everyone has to be something, right? No idea, but I’m starting to figure out who I am.

As I’ve grown in my sexuality, I’ve realized two things. The first is I need a man to love and make love to me. I need sex to function like tires need air to roll. The second thing was that, like every good diet, I neededvariety.

I can’t imagine having a polyamorous relationship because I don’t want to pursue people on my own.

When I’m with my lover other people are an extension of our relationship and not separate from it. Watching a woman suck his cock is sexy because who wouldn’t want to suck it?

I love his cock!

The last time we arranged to meet another couple my lover was running late, so told me to start without him. I checked into our hotel, bathed, slipped into my long black nightgown, had wine, and waited for our friends. It was relaxing in a way I seldom get.

When they arrived, they changed, had a drink, and we started in. She was first up. Lifting my gown after I lay back, her tongue went to work. Hubby took his turn and then ate her too.

I have to say it was lovely having a couple go down on me in turns. When they switched to her extensive toy collection I was in heaven.

I didn’t eat her this time but half-heartedly played with her boobs. That was more a courtesy than out of any enthusiasm. The reason I had sex with her was so my lover could watch.

And he was missing.

My lover hadn’t arrived at that point, so I was going through the motions. Performing for him turns me on, whether it’s with my toys or someone else. When he’s there, I’m comfortable, and that comfort allows me to try new things or more of old things.

When he finally showed up, we were taking a break, having a laugh and a drink. He later told me he was a little disappointed because he wanted to walk in on the action.

We’ve met these people twice and still aren’t too sure about them, so we’ve only done soft swap stuff (see definition here). They’re friendly, but my lover isn’t attracted to her.

She has a pretty face, but he likes fuller breasts and said she tastes a little bitter. I’ve gone down on her but don’t have anything to compare her to, and can’t say I’m looking to try more. He has a nice cock, but I haven’t given him oral yet.

After the break, they were about to leave but I stopped them. We each took a bed, and as she began sucking him, my lover asked me what went on. As much as I like performing, my lover enjoys watching me perform and seeing men worship my body.

When I ate her the first time, what turned me on was how horny he got watching us. I love hearing his rough breathing when he’s getting close, and that’s what made eating her work for me.

I started sucking him as he watched them, but he was tired and kept getting floppy. He told me that he wanted to hold me while watching.

I’ll never turn down a snuggle, so that was fine.

We had sex after they left and fell asleep in each other’s arms. No matter what I’m doing, I’m happiest doing it with him because he makes me so hot.

I’ll do anything for him, but only when he’s there.

So it’s not monogamy, because I’m married, but I’m only in love with my lover. That makes me monoamorous. Love faded with hubby years ago, and that’s what I wanted to replace. The poly sex is more to do with fulfilling my fantasies with random people, but only with my lover. And it’s unethical because I don’t have permission.

But do I need permission? Maybe.

But I’m almost 50, so you know what? I’ll use my body however I like, thank you very much.

Here’s how tasting my first pussy went —I Had Sex With a Woman For My Affair Partner
Ticking a box for his birthday.medium.com

© Teresa J. Conway, 2020

By Teresa J Conway on .

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Exported from Medium on March 25, 2021.

Author of How to Cheat: Field Notes from an Adulteress, several short stories, I'm active on Medium @teresajconway where I sometimes share my blog posts.

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